[Q-ID0776] Can I have sexual relations with my wife before she has officially moved in with me / ‘rukhsati’?

QUESTION:

What do the scholars of the Dīn and muftīs of the Sacred Law state regarding the following issue: I live in Belgium and I got married seven months ago, and so far my wife has not yet moved in with me. As well as this, there is also of issue of there being women at my workplace who constantly flirt with me. So, am I allowed to have intercourse with my wife, even though she actually lives in Belgium?

Questioner: Brother from Belgium

ANSWER:

بسم اللہ الرحمن الرحیم
الجواب بعون الملک الوھاب اللھم ھدایۃ الحق والصواب

There is no problem in having intercourse after one has got married before one’s wife has moved out of her family home, because she is now your wife and the act of intercourse itself with one’s wife is a lawful action. However, in our society, meeting up with one’s wife before she has left her family home is not considered being something good, hence one should make arrangements for her to move in with yourself i.e. the husband as soon as possible in order to avoid any blame, gibes, scoffing, sneering and pointing of fingers; this will thereby be better for you.

In addition, it is essential that one avoids free mixing & talking freely with non-Mahram women, because undoubtedly, having flirtatious conversations with non-Mahram women causing sexual tension between the two is unlawful, and one should leave such a job in which it is difficult for one to avoid such actions which can lead onto unlawful intercourse etc. because company has an effect.

The one who is worrying now would also remain worried after marriage, because when one hasn’t even yet felt the particular desire being discussed at hand, then this is the state of such effect, and you are at loss in your current state. So, when a person has tasted sweetness after marriage, then this feeling won’t decrease; rather, it will increase, which is apparent to every sane person. Thus, one should find another job in which the aforementioned dangers do not exist.

واللہ تعالی اعلم ورسولہ اعلم صلی اللہ علیہ وآلہ وسلم
کتبہ ابو الحسن محمد قاسم ضیاء قادری

Answered by Mufti Qasim Zia al-Qadri
Translated by Haider Ali

Read the original Urdu answer here: [Q-ID0776] Can I have sexual relations with my wife before she has officially moved in with me / ‘rukhsati’?